Disarming our Language – A Lenten Practice

Are you ever shocked when you hear yourself say something that comes out of your mouth totally different from what you really meant to say?  Or get caught up with negative internal self-talk with words that you wouldn’t say to another person yet somehow mentioned to your own soul frequently?

I read the phrase last week – disarming our language. Pope Leo spoke about the practice of abstaining in Lent:

“…  from words that offend and hurt our neighbor. Let us begin by disarming our language, avoiding harsh words and rash judgement, refraining from slander and speaking ill of those who are not present and cannot defend themselves. Instead, let us strive to measure our words and cultivate kindness and respect in our families, among our friends, at work, on social media, in political debates, in the media and in Christian communities.”

 Later I read what Adam Bucko wrote in his Substack article:

“join me this Lent in “laying down our arms”, in ending the war within us once and for all. Because to be peacemakers in the world, we must first embody peace within ourselves.”

And to be sure I was paying attention to this practice, Jon Acuff wrote in his newsletter about listen to the labels we pin on ourselves. For example, I say over and over again, I am not good at art since I failed scissors in Kindergarten. (true story)  Sounds silly but I have told myself that story for so long it is deeply engraved in my identity – I cannot do fine motor artwork. I am not an artist.

Jon writes: “Here are some common examples of labels:

• “I’m not a morning person.”
• “I’m not good at math.”
• “I’m so disorganized.”
• “I’m terrible at finishing things.”
• “I’m not great at money.”
• “I’m not creative.”
• “I’m always late.”

To which I respond, “Who says?” Who says that just because you struggled with math in elementary school, you’re cursed to be inadequate at it your whole life? Who says that just because you tend to leave too late for appointments, you can’t leave earlier? Who says that just because you’ve struggled with money in the past, you have to struggle with it in the future? You get to write your own labels. . . And no one will stop you from changing your labels. They’re not permanent. Every label you’ve ever given yourself or had given to you by someone in authority was written in dry-erase, not Sharpie.”

Ok God, I get the point. Listen to the words I am using towards others and even towards myself. Are they true? Kind? Productive?  Time to disarm them and neutralize my thoughts and language with more love and gentleness.

When I listen to politicians, the media, the entertainment industry, I want to shout – STOP!  We need to suspend this hatred and quit saying certain words, labels, and name calling. Their actions spread a contagious cloud of antagonism. Then in the next breath, I hear myself doing the same thing.

Time to disarm our language that is destroying relationships and peace in the world and within ourselves. This is both an external and internal battle.

Words are powerful. I can’t change what I hear from the world, but I can start with myself.  As I listen deeply this Lenten season, I am going to listen to how I use words and with God’s help use them in more peaceful, kind ways.

Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me.

I am open to more ideas about disarming our language. Let’s share them here.