You Are More Fun than Bubble Wrap!

You are more fun than bubble wrap! You’re so thoughtful. Thank you for being my friend and listening. You are making a difference!

Compliments – wow they can make our day, don’t they?  January 24 is National Compliment Day and a reminder to share compliments because they can change the world. The power of a compliment is pretty remarkable: either giving or receiving one can boost your happiness and confidence — making the act a win-win. You never know when someone could use some good vibes, so spread the positivity by giving someone a reason to smile!

“A compliment is verbal sunshine.” – Robert Orben

Ever have one of those down days, but then you receive a compliment from someone that turns your mood around? While compliments may seem simple, they can have a large impact on you and the people around you, creating a ripple of positivity. I like that image – a ripple of positivity.

Our brains are wired to receive the words of a compliment at the same level as as being paid a monetary reward. When we get a compliment, the dopamine receptors in our brain spike. These receptors are responsible for our brain’s built-in reward system. When our dopamine receptors activate, it confirms to our body that we’re doing something right. 

A sincere compliment leaves you with a little more joy and maybe a smile on your face. That’s true when you receive a compliment, but it’s also true when you’re giving one!

Being sincere is a must. Some people may make the mistake of formulating their compliment around making the other person feel good, even if the compliment isn’t reflective of their true feelings. Make sure your compliment reflects something you genuinely admire about this person.

Short and specific are also elements of a great compliment.

Anyone else a bit embarrassed then receiving a compliment? I sure am. Sometimes it makes me feel vulnerable realizing they have been watching me. Lately I am trying to savor that moment more and simply say thank you.

We were in the middle of the grocery store when an elderly lady in her motorized shopping cart rode right up next to my husband and me. I recognized her from my area, but her name totally escaped my mind. “I have been wanting to tell you,” she said, “how much I enjoy reading your articles you write. Whenever I see your name, I read the whole thing. Just love your writing.”

I stammered out a weak thank you. Smiling, I told her I enjoyed my job as a feature writer (I was working at that time for our local newspaper) and the opportunity to meet lots of people and learn new things.

The next day a church member told me she had seen a nurse I used to work with at the health department. “She said you were the best boss she ever had. Thought you would enjoy hearing that.”

Wow, two unexpected compliments. Why did they make me feel so uncomfortable, instead of joyful? To be honest I thought, “Oh, no something bad is going to happen now.” Why can’t I just breath in the fresh air of nice words and bask in its pleasure for a moment? Why do I always think I am unworthy of these simple gestures of kindness?

Publicly I responded the “correct” way.  I thanked the giver verbally and with my smile. I accepted the compliments externally with good manners. But internally…

Why are we so uncomfortable with legitimate compliments? Probably because there are so few on them (now that is sad, isn’t it?). Maybe because we have been hurt in the past by false compliments or compliments used to get something. Maybe the compliment stirs up a fear of success and now I have to live up to that expectation. Is it a learned habit of not trusting others or leaning towards a low self-esteem?

My mama used to say we should pass onto others when I hear a compliment said about them that they may not have heard. Another way of spreading a good word. Compliments not only change the person being complimented – it changes us to the better too. We begin to notice the good in others. We find the qualities we want to model.

Mark Twain wrote: “I can live for two months on a good compliment,”

Genuine praise is never wrong. It simply acknowledges the truth that’s there.  Let’s practice this skill more often both in giving and receiving and see the ripple effects of spreading good words can do for the world.

Thank you for reading this wandering blog post today. You are the best!