As a Year Winds Down, Pondering Time

As a year winds down, I become more reflective. I look back on the gifts and challenges of 2023. I dare to start a list of words that might guide me into 2024 plus hopes and dreams that might emerge. I really do like this time of year of pondering and planning.

I tend to want to declutter, clean and rearrange as if a new guest would be arriving. Welcome 2024 – did I impress you with my organizational skills?  HA!  I guess all this rearranging, micro-managing and future detailing is my way of trying to control the passing of time.

Wind down is a funny phrase, isn’t it?  It usually means something that gradually ends, though on December 31, 2023 will suddenly disappear at midnight. Wind down reminds me of the ticking of the clock – ever present, moving and showing the reality of time progressing. The slowing of moments crawling to a standstill.  But time doesn’t stop.

So we wind down the past year and wind up the next one?  Makes 2024 sound tight and possibly twisted so severely it might break. Or weird isn’t it that wind down and wind up have the same meaning in some usages. No wonder I don’t know which way I am going. LOL

Doesn’t it feel like time is slipping away quicker as we age?  Or think back to a situation where time seemed to stand still?  Or at least dragged onward.

Researchers have shown we do perceive time moving faster as we grow older. One reason is when we were young, a year of life amounts to much more time of existence, percentage-wise. For a 10-year-old, one year is 10% of their life. I realized last week my parents have both been dead more than 50 years.  Wow.

And have you realized that in just seven years, 1980 will be 50 years ago?

So often we regret or long for the past, and we fear or anticipate the future. One of my spiritual practices is being present – and I do need to practice this over and over again.

Karoline Lewis writes, “We can recall plenty of quotable quotes about time, in which we want to believe but are often not born out in reality: “time heals all wounds;” “all in good time;” “time will tell;” “stand the test of time;” “time is of the essence.” All of which appear to be attempts to make our mark on time or to regulate time to our benefit.”

And whose calendar or time zone are we perceiving life from? Afterall the new church year calendar just began a full month ahead of our “normal” calendars.  And my friends in South Africa are winding down their day, getting ready to sleep while I am typing in the morning light. What is our season of life? Wow, this rabbit hole of pondering time is swirling out of control. I need God’s wisdom:

2 Peter 3: 8 tells us, “⁸Do not ignore this one fact, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like one day.”

In Psalm 90:2, Moses says, “Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the whole world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God.”

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” (Ecclesiastes 3:11)

The marking of time is irrelevant to God because God transcends it.  And we live in a finite, physical world and God is so much more. God is not tied down to any time constraints, misperceptions, or winding downness. God is timeless.

This brings me comfort knowing God is beyond time and eternal yet stays with us right now no matter our sense of time. I am thankful God holds time, all of time, in his hands.

• Perhaps it is this time of year – Advent – that floods my soul thinking about time.
• Perhaps it is the car accident I experienced last week, realizing how quickly life can change, and how precious life is. (yes we are all ok but the poor car was totaled)
• Perhaps it is the realization that as I age, certain experiences, relationships, and possibilities will never happen.
• Perhaps it is my finally learning to let go, learning to live in uncertainties, and learning to trust God with whatever happens in my time here on earth.

Learning to trust God’s timing is not easy.  This is partly due to our sin and unbelief. I try to fully understand and control things in life which in reality cannot happen.  Time is also a gift. I want to be a good steward of this treasure.

“So be very careful how you spend time. There is nothing more precious. In the twinkling of an eye heaven may be won or lost. God shows that time is precious, never giving two moments of time side by side, but always in succession.”
— The Cloud of Unknowing

Trying to hold, control, manage time is impossible. But not for God. Beside my misperception of time as I age, my trust in God deepens with each year.

And I for one, am glad he is in control.