Have you ever bargained with God? I suspect many of us if we are honest, have tried to tell God what to do, how to do it and even demanded when to have the job complete. I experienced that lately.I still have three wisdom teeth who live happily in the back of my mouth. My goal was to hold onto them until I was at least 90. But one is chipped and another decayed, so my dentist’s advice was to get them out. “Just make an appointment with the oral surgeon,” he said.I hate dentists. And this suggestion of course put them even lower on my list. So my bargaining with the Almighty began.“Ok Lord, if You really, really want me to do this, things have to be perfect. But I expect they won’t be. I know when I call for an appointment, it will be months before I get in. The receptionist will be cold, cruel and look remarkably like the Wicked Witch of the West. I will see cockroaches in the corner snacking on crumbs left behind by frightened children. The strong body odor of the slimy surgeon … [Read more...]
Finishing Well – Lectio Divina January 17, 2010
Lectio Divina - a holy reading of the Bible slowly, savoring it, and enjoying it with the Lord – is the spiritual practice of sacred reading of the scriptures. The intention is not to learn or gain information but to deepen our relationship with God. St Benedict encourages us to “to listen with the ear of our hearts.” Join me once a week for Lectio Divina. I will share a verse and a word that spoke to my heart. Read and listen to the verses here. And gently ask God for a word or phrase that speaks to your heart for that day – that is what lectio means. Once we find that gift, we hold it, meditate, and savor its meaning. This step is called meditation. Then offer that word back to God in prayer or the third step of oratio. In prayer we allow our real selves to be touched and changed by the word of God. Finally, we simply rest in the presence of the One who has used His word as a means of inviting us to accept His transforming embrace. No one who has ever been in love needs … [Read more...]
Listening Up for God – Moment by Moment
Do you listen up or listen down? Hearing God clearly isn’t like turning on the light switch – suddenly everything is clear. Listening to where God is leading us often takes time, prayer, awareness, and hearing what others advise. Whole books and semester long classes address discernment. Learning this skill is a task we will never complete in a lifetime, but is one that is constantly being refined and renewed.When it comes to big life changing decisions – do I take this job? Should I marry this person? - I try to listen closely for God’s guidance. But when it comes to the everyday moment to moment living, I often go my own route only remembering God much later, often after I overcommitted myself. I give way too much power to my to-do list and not enough to paying attention to the Lord.Reading my emails this week brought this into focus for me.I receive an e-newsletter called the Prosperous Writer by Christina Katz . She has authored two books - The Writer Mama and Get Known Before the … [Read more...]
Making Friendship a Lifelong Priority
A friend died last week. After hearing the news, memories flooded me – John installing a ceiling fan with my husband with a “blind leading the blind” type of sit com hilarity and for many years that fan rattled every time they turned it on, early morning coffees together on Saturday morning, solving the world’s problems and John showing us his new car while proudly announcing it was time to find a wife. I smile remembering John.Valuing our friends shouldn’t only come when we lose someone. The past few years I have been trying to reconnect with friends from the past. When I wrote my new years resolutions this year, that wasn’t one of them – I have added it so once again friendship will be a priority for me. Making time for friends will be a permanent addition to my list.Two of my best friends met in kindergarten. I was the latecomer joining them in sixth grade. Wendy and Chrissy are lifelong childhood companions, now more like special sisters to me.My friend Nancy is my role model … [Read more...]
Sowing in Tears – Lectio Divina January 10, 2010
Lectio Divina - a holy reading of the Bible slowly, savoring it, and enjoying it with the Lord – is the spiritual practice of sacred reading of the scriptures. The intention is not to learn or gain information but to deepen our relationship with God. St Benedict encourages us to “to listen with the ear of our hearts.” Join me once a week for Lectio Divina. I will share a verse and a word that spoke to my heart. Read and listen to the verses here. And gently ask God for a word or phrase that speaks to your heart for that day – that is what lectio means. Once we find that gift, we hold it, meditate, and savor its meaning. This step is called meditation. Then offer that word back to God in prayer or the third step of oratio. In prayer we allow our real selves to be touched and changed by the word of God. Finally, we simply rest in the presence of the One who has used His word as a means of inviting us to accept His transforming embrace. No one who has ever been in love needs … [Read more...]
I Surrender
“We can only learn to know ourselves and do what we can,Namely, surrender our will and fulfill God’s will in us.” Teresa of AvilaI like control. The comfort of knowing what is happening and what to expect. The power to do what I need to do, on my self-created timetable, and in my own way.Yet living out of my ego and self desires does not satisfy the emptiness in my heart. This God-created void nudges me to once again acknowledge my way isn’t the best way. God calls us to live differently - to surrender our wills to Him and to relinquish the control, power and expectations we cling to so tightly. To be honest I sing the hymn “I Surrender All” with my fingers crossed. Maybe God won’t hear me that day and I can still stay in charge a little longer. Perhaps I can fool Him, hide from him like Adam and Eve did when they too sought power for themselves instead of seeking God, the all powerful. We live this life backwards with eyes focused on ourselves, not on God. The writer of the words … [Read more...]
Epiphany – Time to Bless your Home
Epiphany is my word of the week.Epiphany - even the sounds of this word roll off the tongue in smooth, grace-filled manner.Epiphany. January 6 is when the church celebrates Epiphany, also called Theophany in the Eastern Churches, recognizing the visit of the Wise Men to the Christ child.The word "epiphany" also means to have a sudden understanding or insight. Reading about epiphany this year did open my eyes with a new understanding of this long time Christian observance. It also brought back memories of my 2006 trip to Germany.Epiphany is an ancient feast, dating to the 3rd century in the East. In the East, the Epiphany feast pre-dates the Christmas feast, although the West knew of the Nativity Feast before the Epiphany feast. Originally the Epiphany celebrated the Baptism of Christ. The Church in Jerusalem celebrated Christ's Nativity on January 6 until AD 549.The Epiphany feast was introduced in the Western Church by the 4th century, but the connection between the feast and … [Read more...]
Thomas Merton’s Prayer and Abraham’s Faith – Lectio Divina January, 3, 2010
By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going. Hebrews 11: 8Even though He did not know where he was going.I feel that way most of the time, Lord. Moving all the time yet not knowing where I am going.Reminds me of Thomas Merton's Prayer:My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you and I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing. And I know that if I do this, you will lead me by the right road although I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death, I will not fear, for you are ever with me and you will never leave me to face my … [Read more...]