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Grief and Gratitude – Antidotes for the Coronavirus

March 31, 2020 By Jean Wise

Could grief and gratitude be antidotes for the shroud of the coronavirus enveloping our hearts and minds?

I feel bombarded by every aspect of life impacted by this pandemic. Blogs. News. Texts. Emails. Memes. Advertisements. Conversations.

Pandemic comes from the Greek language – pan meaning all and demos being people. Something affecting all people. Not just the number of people but also the huge influence on individuals and society.

Coronavirus has hijacked our lives and consumed our time.

Grief

Last week I mentioned I am being aware of naming my emotions and the one that keeps rising within me to describe this discomfort I am experiencing is grief. Remember the feelings we undergo with grief?  Shock, disbelief, anger, sadness, resolution/acceptance.

One aspect of healing is to admit what we have lost. The loss of connection. The loss of worshiping together. The loss of work. The loss of life. The economic loss. The loss of vacation. The loss of a much-anticipated silent retreat. The loss of knowing what is next on the calendar. The loss of spring sports. The loss of the dream wedding. The loss of normalcy.

Let’s name what is going on within us, mourn our losses, then move onward with more strength and wisdom.

One type of grief is anticipatory grief coming from uncertainty – when will this end? I wonder if our Disney trip this summer will also be canceled. What will my next paycheck amount to? Will there be a recession or worse, depression? What if my family gets sick?

Being an introvert, I have adjusted to sheltering at home. I know extroverts who feel like they are in jail and crawling up the walls. We grieve our loss of freedom and control. It is hard to let go of what we cannot control and seek the things we can control. Especially in this new strange land, we have entered.

We are all experiencing collective grief. Grief is often a lonely journey with ups and downs and surprising twists and turns, a time we hunger for support and hugs from family and friends. Isn’t it ironic in our moment of mutual grief, we need to practice physical distancing?  Yet I have hope – I have been phoning different people within our parish to see how they are doing. Delightful interactions full of laughter, sharing, and connecting in a new yet deep way.

I am thankful for these phone calls.

Gratitude

I posted this on Facebook last week and was amazed at the response in the comments;

Today I am grateful for:
• Seeing the sunrise
• Lighting a candle while I pray
• The taste of a cinnamon roll with a freshly brewed cup of coffee
• Connecting with family and friend over the phone and social media
• The routine of ordinary chores, like emptying the dishwasher
• Food on my table
• Robins in my back yard
• Daffodils pushing up through the dark soil
• Washing my winter coat and pausing to be thankful I HAVE a winter coat
Thank you, Lord. What are you grateful for today?

I had a wonderful response and sharing thankfulness from friends. I felt better. I think they did too.

Gratitude heals our wounded spirits and soothes our shaken spirits like a salve. We grow stronger and more courageous when we are thankful. We focus more on God and our blessings and less on our sadness and loss.

During this turbulent time, we recognize the wide array of feelings, many stemming from grief. We then chose to be thankful, knowing the practice of gratitude brings healing.

And we WILL heal.

And grow.

And learn.

And be whole again.

What are you grateful for today? Have you experienced grief through this time? Let’s share with one another.

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Filed Under: spiritual lessons

Comments

  1. Denise Maryott says

    April 3, 2020 at 4:01 pm

    When this is over we will appreciate our time with each other more, our ability to leave our home, and do the things we have currently put on hold. We will raise a Hallelujah louder than before as we fellowship together in our churches!
    I am grateful to have a home that is warm, with comfortable furniture and my husband by my side! I am also grateful to have the freedom to read my Bible as I wish and to hear my worship service by Live feed!
    And most importantly I am thankful for the first responders who are willing to be in the middle of this Pandemic and I pray for them everyday!

    • blankJean Wise says

      April 4, 2020 at 3:05 pm

      There will be good things that we learn and see from all this. Things we lose and just hold too. What a celebration we will have when we can gather again together for worship. A real homecoming. Lots to be grateful for too – friends like you for example

  2. blankLisa notes says

    April 1, 2020 at 2:30 pm

    I’m trying to be more aware of naming my emotions too. Thanks for this reminder, Jean. I am “meeting” with my book club online in about an hour and hope to follow a Brene Brown suggestion to let everyone say one word that describes how they are right now. Brene has begun a new podcast and I’m very excited about it.

    • blankJean Wise says

      April 2, 2020 at 3:05 pm

      We are both three’s so is hard to name those emotions. Glad you are getting together remotely. staying in touch is so important.

  3. blankLinda Stoll says

    April 1, 2020 at 7:55 am

    This is such a breath of fresh air this morning, friend. Gratitude for every good thing is a key component in moving ahead into the unknowns …

    • blankJean Wise says

      April 2, 2020 at 3:09 pm

      THank you Linda. I just knew when I practice gratitude my heart felt lighter. Stay in touch.

  4. blankNancy Ruegg says

    March 31, 2020 at 5:35 pm

    I love your conclusion, Jean. “We WILL heal. And grow. And learn. And be whole again.” And won’t it be grand when we can return to normal and normal will feel incredibly special?

    • blankJean Wise says

      April 2, 2020 at 3:10 pm

      We WILL get there – it seems long and unknown now but we WILL! and yes it will be grand. I hope I don’t ever neglect these things I take for granted.

  5. blankMartha J Orlando says

    March 31, 2020 at 10:08 am

    A grateful heart and spirit are a healing balm, Jean. I’m counting my blessings each and every day, even the smallest ones. We will stay strong in the faith, and we will make it to the other side with valuable lessons learned.
    Blessings!

    • blankJean Wise says

      April 2, 2020 at 3:11 pm

      isn’t it powerful how always counting our blessings works so well yet we forget it. Yes we will stay storng with each other too

  6. blankMargaret Bretzloff says

    March 31, 2020 at 9:07 am

    I too am trying to have a routine that includes time to be thankful, too look around and call out things like the mass of tiny blue bulbs in my garden. To take the time to make phone calls and send cards.

    Take care
    God’s peace

    • blankJean Wise says

      April 2, 2020 at 3:13 pm

      So good to hear from you Margaret and yes being grateful is a powerful practice. Watch those flowers bloom – how uplifting!

Healthy Spirituality – a sacred space to nurture your faith, grow closer to God, and belong to a community, walking together on life’s journey. This blog is written by author, speaker and retreat leader Jean Wise

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