Discernment is one of the main reasons people seek out a spiritual director. They genuinely desire to hear God clearer and experience the divine in a deeper way for guidance and growth. Discernment is intentional decision making in the light of God. This essential spiritual practice is one we keep learning about on our entire walk with God. I have featured this practice several times in the past here and here on Healthy Spirituality. One of the difficulties in discernment is the multiple options we now have in our lives. Maybe we can choose between something wrong vs right or hateful vs. loving, but what about those gray areas with many in-between choices? Most of our possibilities fall in the middle of the spectrum with a large range of advantages and disadvantages. Good Better Best Use in the Foggy Middle One technique I have been using when discerning my next right step is to list the viable and realistic choices and then rate them: Good, Better, Best. To be … [Read more...]
Creating Your Own Spiritual Retreat
I desperately need my annual spiritual retreat. I shared a post here on Healthy Spirituality in early March about getting ready to go on a silent retreat. I craved the time away with God. With joy, I anticipated the silence. I diligently prepared, prayed, and planned. Things don't always turn out like we want or need, do they? Need I say more than one word: Covid. Retreat canceled. Actually, my retreat was one of the first things to be scratched on my filled calendar and came as a shock. Looking back its deletion was the first domino of a string of tumbling that continues to fall. Creating My Own Retreat I have retreated at home in the past (see this blog post for some ideas) but getting away to a quiet area offers more depth for me. I am a spiritual director and have several directees creating their own retreats. One in a cabin he owns in a woods. Another at home. They inspire me. I called the retreat center and found out while they were not hosting formal … [Read more...]
What Do You Need to Let Go?
To let go is hard. I tend to cling to what I know, stay in the rut of self-pity too long and dwell in the past rather than moving forward, even when the healing has begun. I admit this. I am beginning to recognize this tendency quicker than I used to, and I am learning to let go. I love Emily P. Freeman's podcast, The Next Right Thing. A few weeks ago, she challenged us to "Leave It Behind." Well worth your time to listen to her wise words. Emily first discussed names we were and are called and continue to call ourselves. Do you have a nickname? What did your parents call you? Your friends? Your adversaries? I still hear a collection of monikers echoing in my heart: Jean Anne, Ammie, Jeanie, Indian Fatso (from 6th grade - ugh!) J, and Beanie. My weight watcher friends now call me Lean Jean – I like that one. ( : Emily shares: "Your life is a story already happening, and you bring every name with you wherever you go. Like … [Read more...]
Monthly Musings – What I Learned in July
I haven't written a monthly musing post since February – remember that month? Prepandemic? When events were still on the calendar? Vacations anticipated and planned? How quickly our worlds turned upside down. Yet the practice of reflection, examining where you soul is, how you spend your time, and how are you nourishing yourself in all dimensions, continues to ground us and grows us deeper. I think it is time I ponder July and possibly back even further. I like to look back at what I am discovering, learning, and exploring in life – I call these my monthly musings. Capturing these special moments gives meaning, depth, and delight to life. Let’s wake up to the wonders in the ordinary all around us. I record what I notice on the pages of my Monthly Musings Journal. You can use anything, scrapes of papers, a journal, or a calendar. Copies of my Monthly Musings Journal are available on Amazon and are a convenient way to keep track of the little things in life we often … [Read more...]
Fight – Flight – Forgive
To forgive is hard when all the human mind and heart wants to do is fight or flight. I have been wrestling with this concept for the past week. You see, a week ago two incidents ripped open old wounds in my soul. Places I thought were healed. Holes I assumed were restored. Hungers no longer driving my behavior. Other people's choices impacted my story in a deep disruptive way. Maybe I am more fragile due to these uncertain times we are living in or maybe now was God's time to revisit my deep hurts for more healing. Probably both. The attacks arrived about four days apart and immediately I took my stance to fight. I will show them. I will never again… I know I will do this in retaliation… Then I reversed into flight. I am done. I am leaving. I always knew… Never again will I… Fight and flight are normal human reactions to a threat. Humans would not have survived this long on earth without this protective … [Read more...]
Our Invitation to be ROYAL
Are you royal? But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s own people, in order that you may proclaim the mighty acts of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light. 1 Peter 2: 9 I helped to present a program last week about filling our wells as a writer and used the acronym of ROYAL. Not surprising the writers loved it and added more concepts to each of the letters. Is Your Well Full or Empty or Someplace in Between? What is the level of your well? That place deep inside you where you find peace, strength, wisdom? That reserve that keeps you going? Are you burned out? Is Covid draining your soul? Is the uncertainty of this time we are living in depleting your soul? Good news: God doesn’t burn out. Exhaustion, burnout, and depression are not signs that you are doing God’s will. God is gentle and loving. God desires to give you a deep sense of safety in God’s love. Once you have allowed yourself to … [Read more...]
Lift Every Voice and Sing – Hymn Story
Lift Every Voice and Sing is one of the hymns sung in my church. Just a side note: my local parish just recently resumed in-person worship gatherings – yes, masks and social distancing - but no singing due to the aerosol projection making it unsafe – and wow, do I miss the singing but for the sake of others, we don't. I knew this hymn but never knew its story until it became part of the news stories last month. Here is the song in case you don't know it: Lift Every Voice and Sing Story Lift Every Voice and Sing was written by James Weldon Johnson and what a life of accomplishment, creativity, service, and leadership he gave our country. He surely used the gifts that God gave him in many ways. Johnson was a civil rights activist, writer, composer, politician, educator and lawyer. Born in Florida in 1871and he was the first African American to pass the bar exam in Florida. After graduating from Atlanta University, Johnson worked as a principal in a grammar school and … [Read more...]
Chocolate. Yummy Lessons from God
Chocolate. One of the world's most favorite flavors. Let's have some fun today and forget the troubles of this earth for a few minutes Did you know today, July 7 is World's Chocolate Day? Now October 28 is National Chocolate Day, but I am all for celebrating with chocolate more than once, right? In fact, I shared last year some interesting trivia about this delicious taste. https://healthyspirituality.org/chocolate/ One of my most requested topics as speaker and retreat leader is called “What Chocolate Taught Me about God.” This the story I tell at the beginning of the talk and I thought today would be a great day to share this: ~~~~~~~ What Chocolate Taught Me about God God decided one week to be creative. After the first day of work when he returned to heaven, Michael, the archangel, asked him, “What did you do today, Lord? He answered, “I made light and darkness, and it is good.” After a second day of work, God sat down … [Read more...]