The weather was delightful in northwest Ohio for our Fourth of July cookout. Food smelled great. The table was set. Games ready to go. Friends arrived. Laughter abounded. The Party is Crashed. Then the Party Crashers invaded. Four grey kittens and one calico kit invited themselves into our backyard to folic and celebrate the holiday with us. It didn’t bother them that two of our guests were allergic to cats. Nor was it their concern that one of my best friends shudders with even the thought or sight of these feline beasts. I shooed them away. I yelled. I chased them out. Yet they kept returning. I fretted and fussed over their insistence to stay. We tried all sorts of remedies to move our unwanted guests – all humane of course. I steamed as we finally moved our human group inside the house away from furry invaders. Two of them had to nerve (probably to spite me) to sit by the back door, meowing in their cute baby voices, tilting their cute heads and begging to be … [Read more...]
One Surprising Award of Deep Listening
As a spiritual director I have learned the practice of deep listening. And besides being beneficial for the people I companion, I have discovered one surprising award for myself. Deep listening involves quieting myself through prayer, stillness and deep breathes before meeting with someone. Then while I sit with them, I am open to the Spirit’s whispers, nudges and leading to offer silence, ask questions and pause before speaking. The focus is about the person I am with, their reflections, not my opinions. I am fully present to them. I honor the sacred ground I am on with another and hold that moment without judgment. I listen for the unspoken words, the hidden meanings behind their stories, where God may be appearing in their life. As I cultivate this deep listening skill, I have been surprised to notice I now listen to myself more deeply too. All those gifts offered freely to another: presence, nonjudgmental, silence, pause, honoring the inner stirrings, and sorting out of … [Read more...]
5 Ways Spiritual Retreats Transform Your Life
Why in the world did I sign up for such a long retreat? This is exactly what I lamented a couple of weeks ago as the retreat I registered for many months ago loomed and interrupted my summer plans and activities. Eight days is a huge chunk of time and energy away from home, family and my precious to-do list. But my mind was hungry to learn. My heart needed refreshed. My spirit parched. And God called. I am so grateful for the time away with God. My mind has been stretched, encompassing new thoughts. My heart nourished and my spirit drenched. The retreat was presented by Louis Savary, a former Jesuit and author who shared ideas from his latest book, The New Spiritual Exercises – In the Spirit of Pierre Teilhard de Chardin. The format of the retreat was a wonderful mixture of time learning, time of private pondering, journaling and prayer and time to share in a small group. Louis rarely talked more than 30 minutes on an idea, gave us ideas for something to work on, … [Read more...]
My Fitbit and Me – Housewalking
Our summer challenge in Weight Watchers is to get more active. I love a good challenge and decided to “walk” the distance between my home and Avon, North Carolina, home of the Outer Banks. This is our destination for our next trip the middle of September. So my Fitbit and I are going for a walk. I am tracking the distance – 846 miles! I need to walk about 9 miles a day from June 1 to mid September. That will give me some leeway for the weeks we have company or times I don’t get or can’t get the miles done. Stepwise – this is around 21000 steps a day for me. I know I sound crazy but I usually do accomplish 15000-20000 so this is pushing myself just a little more. Why I am telling you this? (And all the while praying you don’t stop reading or unsubscribe since now you think I am looney) Two reasons: Please hold me accountable and in your prayers. I promise to report later on in the summer how I am progressing but also promise not to bore you with frequent accounts. The … [Read more...]
Defining Discernment
I met with a new client last week who was seeking a spiritual director. I always schedule one meeting when starting with a new person just to talk about spiritual direction and clarify expectations. I mentioned one reason people seek spiritual direction is in the time of discernment. He asked me to define discernment. I told him I thought discernment was discovering and articulating how God is moving in our lives. We listen deeply together to identify how the spirit is guiding us in live. Once home I was curious how others define discernment. Here are some definitions I found. Discernment is a spiritual understanding and an experiential knowledge of how God is active in daily life…Discernment is faith living and listening to God’s love and direction so that we can fulfill our individual calling and shared mission…The purpose of discern is to know God’s will, that is , to find accept and affirm the unique way in which God’s love is manifest in our life. Henri Nouwen. “The … [Read more...]
And How’s That Workin’ For You?
My Weight Watcher leader asked us to think about our journey to eating and living healthier. I have struggle with my weight all my life – I entered the world more than nine pounds and at one point just a few years ago topped 260#. Though I have lost quite a bit of weight, my long-term goal still taunts me from afar. “And how’s that workin’ for you?” Karey asked as I thought about how I like to snack graze all day long, sipped an occasional wine (Weight Watchers does allow that!!) and skip my exercise. With my recent weight plateau, obviously, my current pattern of weight loss is NOT working at all. I found this question invaded other aspects of my life. My writing goals sit dormant and untouched since April. “How’s that workin’ for you?” My morning time of deepening contemplative prayer? Only occasionally. “How’s that workin’ for you?” Those long-term projects to complete by March, April, May – ha! “How’s that workin’ for you?” “How’s that workin’ for you?” dwells … [Read more...]
Do You Have a Yearly Focus?
Do you have a topic or issue you focus on each year? Something you want to learn more about. Maybe an organization you wanted to explore and get involved with. Possibly a theme, book or subject shimmers in your spirit and invites you in. Some of us choose a word for the year to frame our year (or at times the word chooses us). My word this year is STILLNESS and it continues to surround and enhance my spiritual walk in 2015. But I also have two topics that have arisen to read about, learn more about and explore this year: The Desert Mothers and Fathers and Discernment. I have been gathering some books and articles about each topic. I have listened to a couple of webinars about these subjects and attended a retreat addressing one. My pile of head knowledge and books have grown, but now it is time to digest and sit with them. I need time and silence to let their stories and wisdom sink into my roots and nourish my soul. I looked at my weekly calendar today and intentionally … [Read more...]
Trusting God
How can we learn to better trust in God? When I conducted a survey of many of you last year this was one topic that came up in many of the responses. Trusting God is a common struggle and one I think we all deeply would like to improve. I have two prayers lately I have brought to God – over and over again. I repeat them constantly during the day – just in case he didn’t hear them the first (second and third and so on) times. I beat on heaven’s door with these requests and stick them on with permanent, if not eternal, gorilla glue. My heart to God’s heart type of deep desire. The other day my prayer became a mantra: I will trust in you. I WILL trust in you. Please help me trust in you. Trusting God isn’t a “I can do this myself” self accomplishment. Ironic isn’t it? I need to trust God to help me better trust in him. What does trusting in God mean anyway? Trusting in God means clinging to the knowledge we are his beloved children and he knows what is best for us. He … [Read more...]