I missed a meeting a few weeks. Totally forgot I made the commitment to attend it. If I had just taken the time to think that day, I would have realized it. But no, I fixed all my attention of my to-do list and my all-important busyness, totally forgetting my obligation.As I traveled this morning, I beat myself up once again about my lapse of memory. “You really should have remembered that. How could you be so stupid?” Then I listened to myself. Why, I would never talk to another human being in that tone of voice or use those words. How cruel, mean, and heartless. Why am I treating myself this way?Dan Milligan wrote, "So be gentle with yourself; show yourself the same kindness and patience you might show a young child - the child you once were. If you won’t be your own friend, who will be? If, when playing an opponent, you are also opposing yourself, you will be outnumbered." A few years back I heard a speaker say, “Listen to your own self-talk.” I tried it and was shocked by the … [Read more...]
Secret to Longevity: Friendship
Want a long healthy life? Researchers at Brigham Young University and the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill gathered data from 148 studies on health outcomes and social relationships. They looked at every paper on this subject they could find. Their research ended up including more than 300,000 people. What did they find? People with poor social connections had on average 50% higher odds of death in the study's follow-up period (an average of 7.5 years) than people with more robust social ties.Friends keep you healthy.God created community to help us thrive in our health in all areas: physical, emotionally and spiritual. I would add social health too.When I was in graduate school, drained physically and mentally from balancing work, parenting, and school, I resolved to do one action over summer break in all the dimensions of health to revive my spirit. Physically, I walked at least three times a week. Mentally I escaped the world of serious non-fiction and enjoyed good … [Read more...]
Living Deliberately
My friend, Candy, went skydiving last week. Yes that's Candy in the photo. She posted her adventure on Facebook (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXLjJSybrtQ) and I laughed as I watched it – she never stopped smiling. She embraced life, took the challenge, and literally let go. Candy lives deliberately – experiencing each day. She didn’t let fear or excuses stop her from achieving a deep desire in her heart. Now I am not going skydiving and am not recommending it either, but doesn’t it make you wonder what has been on your bucket list too long and needs attention? What God given yearning is buried in your heart under the clutter of everyday chores and other people’s demands? Henry David Thoreau lived deliberately. He rose every morning with the intention to absorb very crumb of the day. He wrote, “I want to live deep and suck all the marrow out of life…to know it by experience.” I think most of us walk around half asleep or even worse half dead. We get caught up with our … [Read more...]
God’s Delightful Creativity in the Deep Sea
Behold the work of the Lord.Newscasts last week carried this story:“Remote-controlled cameras sent down to depths of more than 4,500 feet in the Coral Sea, northeast of the northern Australian city of Cairns, have brought back unprecedented views of six-gilled sharks, giant oil fish, swarms of crustaceans and nautiluses that have been compared to "living fossils."The photographs fascinated me. Just think we had no idea these creatures even existed until the camera captured them. God created their brilliant colors, symmetrical bumps and flowing tentacles and set them free to dance just for Him these last million years or so. Now He is sharing them with us, His deep sea delights.When the photos appeared on the television screen, their beauty drew my attention. I abruptly stopped everything else and said, “Only God could have made something so wildly imaginative as these fish.” The photographs haunted me. With the renewed effort to be green and the tragedy with the oil spill in the … [Read more...]
Lighten my Heart, Lord – Light as a Feather
Ma'at, the Egyptian goddess of justice, truth and order, was always depicted wearing a white ostrich feather in her hair. The Egyptians believed that when they died they would enter the underworld or the Hall of the Dead where Ma’at would weigh their hearts against the weight of a feather to determine the worthiness of his or her soul. If the heart was free from the impurities of sin, and therefore lighter than the feather, then the dead person could enter the eternal afterlife. A heart could be made light as a feather by lifetime of kind deeds, love and care for the needed. Makes the expression – “lighten up”- take on new meaning, doesn’t it? My heart has been heavy lately – full of hurts, anger, and resentments. Reading this story reminded me it was time to lighten up my heart. Time to replace my negative emotions for more Christlike characteristics of kindness, gentleness, and love. Being able to find an image to describe a problem or situation I face helps me … [Read more...]
God Bends Down to Hold the Ordinary
My one-year-old granddaughter, Kyla, has been here the past three days as her parents help put on a new roof on our house. My duties while they lifted, hammered, and sweated in the hot summer sun? Babysit!!Now being a good grandma I have a collection of fun and developmental correct toys and lots of books for her. Yet what was her favorite activity? Playing in the backyard with stones. I was fascinated watching her. She looked intently at the ordinary river rocks, spied just the one she wanted and gingerly picked it up like it was the most precious stone on earth. She held it tenderly in her hands, murmur baby talk as if she knew somehow the rock would recognize the words, then lay it gently down. I have stepped on these rocks in my back yard for a number of years and never once took the time to notice the individual colors, shapes and differences. I wonder what other everyday miracles I miss. One year old Kyla reminded me, this old grandma, that paying attention is a powerful … [Read more...]
What Does God Look Like?
How do you see God? Judy Cannato wrote in her newsletter last week, “Healthy spiritual growth is normally characterized by the evolution of images of God. Often spiritual directors ask directees to recall how their picture of the divine has changed over the decades.” What does God look like when you visualize him? Or her? The book, The Shack, shocked some people’s image of God when the author portrayed God as a black woman. When I was younger God was a tall old man with long white beard sitting off in the distance. As my spiritual walk continued, God often was a more of a companion, friend, gentle guide and encourager nurturing me slowly to grow closer to him.Last year I noticed my image of God moved away, like he was once again sitting in the corner, not close. My spiritual director encouraged me to reflect on this movement: did He move or did I? To be honest, I kept Him at arm’s length for a while during a dry spiritual period and it was only after returning to quiet meditative … [Read more...]
Spiritual Discouragement – a Messy Muck
Recent newscasts show the growing tragedy of the geysers of oil spewing into the Gulf of Mexico. Perhaps the scene that breaks my heart the most is the wildlife struggling to survive, drenched in thick brown muck. Some float and most barely walk, no, they weakly stagger, under the weight of the heavy oil. The only signs of life we can see is their desperate eyes pleading for help. They know they cannot save themselves. They seek hope. The cleaning process for these exhausted birds begins with covering them in Canola oil, followed by a thorough bath in dishwashing detergent and water. Volunteers spend at least one full painstaking hour of scrubbing, rubbing, and rinsing to get each bird clean. I thought of these pelicans this past weekend when discouragement overwhelmed my heart. I dragged with a heaviness of spirit, weighted down in the messy muck of this favorite tool of the devil. The evil one knows too well my Achilles heel and attacks me, especially when I am … [Read more...]